Welcome! Glad you found us.

Basically, sex was a taboo subject in the CS circles in which I grew up.

Two incidents stick out in my mind in response to your question:

The straight talk about sex at the youth conference consisted mostly of warnings of abstinence, but nothing about from what we were to abstain. I now also believe in abstinence outside of marriage, but the most practical advice offered was to always keep the width of a S&H (the CS text book) between members of the opposite sex even when dancing. Sorry, there was another piece of advice - keep a Bible clamped between your knees. I would have very much preferred to have heard a CS perspective on the birds and the bees such as how far was too far to go and what role did sex play in marriage. From my perspective at the time, a talk based on the Song of Solomon and the Marriage chapter of S&H would have been useful and interesting. My first marriage suffered greatly and ultimately ended because of the CS perspectives on sex.

A few years later I recalled that conference while speaking with friends including the current CS teacher. I suggested that a Sentinel article which realistically dealt with sexual issues would be something of value to young CSists. Her reaction indicated just how wholly inappropriate she considered the subject. She said such discussions were only appropriate between spouses and not for publication. I didn't press her on how spouses were to have anything to discuss, but I believe that was the last conversation of any depth I had with her.

Among the youth I grew up with in CS, several developed sexual disfunctions including homosexuality and prostititution. One girl who had been at least a third-generation CSist posed for two diffferent "men's" magazines. I later became aware of cases of child abuse. Of my close peers growing up, most are no longer in CS. Some are dead.

Do Go Be Man
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In my house growing up, the topic was pretty much taboo.  The most ridiculously confusing thing for me was when I got married, I had to struggle with whether I should go on the pill or not!  A practitioner couldn't give me an answer, but at that time, you had to agree not to take medicine to join the church!  Just another glaring inconsistency with the religion as well as the philosphy being stuck in a time warp!

Thanks to all who responded to my inquiry!

I've been able to read a few more issues of the Sentinel magazine since it published that issue on Love and Sexuality. It appears that the Luedemann article has been a source of controversy and debate. An anonymous emailer pointed out the Luedemann statement “I don't think premarital sex is a bad thing—if it is done with love instead of lust, with a mutual respect for the other person and an understanding of it being a physical expression of an emotional bond. I would love to know how other people feel about this topic.” The emailer says the Christian Science standard is that sex outside of marriage is not right. As someone who is not a Christian nor a Christian Scientist I have no problems accepting this standard nor does it offend me.

What would be helpful is to have teens and young adults who have achieved some measure of success in their lives and who have abstained from sex as proponents or speakers on sexuality versus someone in their sixties who did not abstain when younger and hasn't  secularly achieved any measurable success in her life. (Just because Luedemann sang for a short time in her early youth with a number of rock artists, I don't see any prospect of her being inducted into the Rock'n Roll Hall of Fame. GinnyL, I'm not picking on you, I'm just using you as an example. So, don't get offended.)

Now, one example of a youthful abstinence speaker who I find really awesome is a virgin Christian man who appeared on the television show “The Bachelor.” The point of this show is for a single man to date a number of attractive eligible females trying to find the perfect match. I don't know his name, but he's still single, incredibly good-looking and has managed to retain his virginity. This approach would make me consider there's a better way than just having premarital sex but I don't think you can find many of these kinds of people in the Christian world, and if the Luedemann's perspective is correct, neither in the Christian Science world.

Many people who are “preaching” abstinence never abstained before they got married. So, it's kind of hard to take them seriously when it comes to talking to younger people. (I find them quite laughable.) In the case of Luedemann, if she sayings it's all right to have premarital sex, then it should also be followed by a strong message to use proper birth control methods and get the necessary sex education training. From the great responses of the ex-Christian Scientists who have posted, it seems it would be good if the Christian Science church gives useful information on being in a marriage relationship. The teenage daughter of the family I'm staying with says a lot of Christian Scientists get divorced.

By the way, the original Sentinel issues I cited gave some websites to look at--spirituality.com and tmcyouth.com. On their tmcyouth.com website one of the topics discussed was birth control. Recommendations included the rhythm method, condoms, and vasectomies.

Just my 2 cents,

Melissa

Sorry I am a newbie to this forum and therefore a little ignorant.

But are you serious that the CS lecturer received a copy of Melissa's thread and sent a post back?

Sorry but I find that weird.

And who's the person in this forum passing on the messages, the dobber?  I find that hilarious.

Oh well now that I know current CSist read this forum I might have to add a little flavour to my threads hehehehehehe!!!!!!

We have a variety of people visiting the fourms, including some dedicatd Christian Scientists. It doesn't surprise me that a CSist would let a lecturer know if he or she came up in conversation.

We try hard to keep our discussions respectful of everyone who comes here, even if we disagree with them. Please keep that in mind.