 Posted Wednesday, January 09, 2008 10:14 AM
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| I am currently seeing a CS and wondering what our chances are for having a successful marriage someday. Of course, the success will depend on us, but just looking for shared experiences here. I will not become a CS (which will obviously be the main hurdle). It is a wonder we are even together based on our religious differences, but we are very happy together and have many other important things in common.
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Posted Wednesday, January 09, 2008 10:55 AM
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| Make SURE you have an understanding about healthcare for your potential children. There have been many sad cases of children suffering and dying under this religion. Also, can you prepare yourself to watch your potential mate refuse medical care? It is terribly tragic to watch loved ones suffer when they are ill and they won't seek help, other than from their practitioner who, be prepared, will play a big part in your private lives. I have had to watch several family members suffer and watch one even die while refusing to consent to medical care. There is also a high number of divorces in this religion. Their "leader" had multiple marriages. It would also depend on what religion you are and how devout you are in your own faith.
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Posted Wednesday, January 09, 2008 11:03 AM
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| Thanks for the feedback. I recognize very clearly the issues concerning children in CS. Can you elaborate on the statement "their practitioner who, be prepared, will play a big part in your private lives." I realize practitioners are used for healing, but in what ways could they play a part in a marriage?
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Posted Wednesday, January 09, 2008 12:03 PM
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| Check out the thread titled Cult-Like Behavior in Practitioners and Teachers.
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Posted Wednesday, January 09, 2008 12:04 PM
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BT,
Welcome to the forums.
Wish I had more time today to respond to your questions. Religion is a core value that when mixed in marriage can lead to troubles. You are wise to consider the issue now rather than later.
We've had a number of discussions over the years on this topic. As a Christian and former CSist, I counsel you to learn as much as you can about CS and not necessarily just those aspects that obviously conflict with Scriptural teachings. In addition to the formal teachings of CS, there are considerable cultural aspects as well.
In my own case when I was a CSist, I dated a Christian woman who knew she opposed CS though could not articulate why in her own words or adequately explain her own beliefs. I attempted to learn what I could about her beliefs in spite of her own inability to discuss them. When I left CS, I joined a church of her denomination though later discovered they too had strayed from Biblical teachings.
Do Go Be Man
<><
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Posted Wednesday, January 09, 2008 12:07 PM
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| It is under General Discussion Not Related to Doctrine.
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Posted Wednesday, January 09, 2008 12:16 PM
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| To better prepare yourself for what you may be getting in for, read Christian Science, The Religion that Kills by Linda Kramer. You will also need to learn an entire new language....animal magnatism, mortal mind, and words from the Bible will also get a new meaning. Adam is not the guy in the fig leaf, but "A DAMN" as in beaver built it.... Fear isn't what you feel when you step on a snake but "False Evidence Appearing Real". Oh, and you won't be real anymore, you will be an illusion and anything that hurts will only be an illusion too. Anytime your intended spouse disagrees with you it will be because your are an "agressive mental suggestion". Its a whole new trip down the rabbit hole with this group!
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Posted Wednesday, January 09, 2008 3:22 PM
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| Sad points, but true in many cases, Gentle Dove. I'll provide links for the thread and book: Thread: Cult Like Behvior With Teachers and Practitioners Book: The Religion that Kills There is also a high number of divorces in this religion. Their "leader" had multiple marriages. This is true, but I want to clarify that Eddy's mulitple marriages were not "because" of CS. Her first husband died and her second marriage ended in divorce before she started CS. Eddy's third husband, Asa Eddy, was her only husband while she was a CSist. He died of heart problems (she declared that he was mentally poisoned) while in CS.
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Posted Wednesday, January 09, 2008 5:05 PM
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| BT, I would be important for you to know that while CSs use practioners for physical healing, they use them for counseling as well. In my experience growing up in CS I observed practioners give advice on marriage, finances, depression, anxiety, lost items, etc. They are often the only source of 'help' that a CS will ever seek out.
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Posted Wednesday, January 09, 2008 9:10 PM
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| I do need to point out what is probably obvious -- that the challenges in a mixed marriage will depend on the personalities involved as well as the religious beliefs. Not all CSists practice "radical reliance" on CS, and many do not rely heavily on practitioners and so are not greatly influenced by them. Some do seek medical care upon occasion. But as there is great potential for difficulty and heartache in a mixed CS non-CS marriage, I agree that it's important for you to learn all you can about "what makes CSists tick" before marrying one.
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