 Posted Friday, July 30, 2004 9:57 PM
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Hi everyone! Hope all are having a great summer & enjoying themselves 
I had to add to the jokes that I recently came across a web site that was titled Mary "Faker" Eddy, which I found to be amusing....
God Bless, Pam
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Posted Saturday, July 31, 2004 2:50 AM
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A funny sight I came across concerned a list of healings performed by MBE - herself in most cases being the only witness. Yep, she even raised the dead. You know Jesus did not write about Himself - His great works performed in front of thousands of witnesses and recorded by the Gospel writers.
Cheers
Jan
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Posted Sunday, August 01, 2004 10:49 PM
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Mary "Faker" Eddy.....cute pun! So I did an Internet Explorer search, and came up with it right away: it's from the American Atheists' website. I just skimmed the article, and, although it is predictaly derisive of everything religious, it gives a fairly concise, comprehensive critique of CS's effects on people, and MBE's problematic biography.
Now, any more jokes?
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Posted Wednesday, May 18, 2005 8:50 AM
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You won't 'get' the CS connection until the last line.
In the beginning, God created the Heavens and the Earth and populated the Earth with broccoli, cauliflower, and spinach, green and yellow and red vegetables of all kinds, so Man and Woman would live long and healthy lives.
And God created the healthful yogurt that Woman might keep the figure that Man found so fair. And Satan brought forth white flour from the wheat, and sugar from the cane and combined them. And Woman went from size 12 to size 18.
So God said, "Try my fresh green salad." And Satan presented
Thousand-Island Dressing, buttery croutons and garlic toast on the
side. And Man and Woman unfastened their belts following the past.
God then said, "I have sent you healthy vegetables and olive oil in
which to cook them." And Satan brought forth deep fried fish and
chicken-fried steak so big it needed its own platter. And Man gained
more weight and his cholesterol went through the roof.
Then God brought forth the potato, naturally low in fat and brimming
with nutrition. And Satan peeled off the healthful skin and sliced the
starchy center into chips and deep-fried them. And Man gained pounds.
God then created a light, fluffy white cake, named it "Angel Food
Cake," and said, "It is good." Satan then created chocolate cake and
named it "Devil's-Food."
Then using God's great gifts, Satan created Ben and Jerry's Ice Cream and Krispy Crème Donuts. And Satan said, "You want chocolate with that?" And Man said, "Yes!" and Woman said, "and as long as you're at it, add some sprinkles." And they gained 10 pounds. And Satan smiled.
God then brought forth running shoes so that His children might lose
those extra pounds. And Satan gave cable TV a remote control so Man would not have to toil changing the channels. And Man and Woman laughed and cried before the flickering blue light and gained pounds.
God then gave lean beef so that Man might consume fewer calories and still satisfy his appetite. And Satan created McDonald's and its
99-cent double cheeseburger. Then said, "You want fries with that?"
And Man replied, "Yes! And super size them!" And Satan said, "It is
good." And Man went into cardiac arrest.
God sighed and created quadruple bypass surgery.
Then Satan created HMOs.
Nyoka
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Posted Wednesday, May 18, 2005 9:26 AM
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That is marvellous, Nyoka! Thanks!
tmcl
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Posted Wednesday, May 18, 2005 9:26 PM
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As we depart from CS, we should leave everything behind, but sometimes we take a few old attitudes, beliefs, loyalties and resentments.
UU, for example, took CS's affinity for Biblical "Higher Criticism" with him.
Nyoka took a distrust of the medical establishment. Anyway, Do-Go-Be-Man and I have been up and down that one with our Jungle Girl, to no avail. The best we can come up with is Do-Go's "think of it as a consumer health issue."
TMCL, Nyoka spent paragraphs espousing the wisdom of sound nutrition--caring for the physical body--and you applaud? It is a rare Christian Scientists who pays attention to nutrition! Good for you!
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Posted Thursday, May 19, 2005 5:29 AM
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I heard this joke a few years ago
Church on Fire...
During a recent ecumenical gathering, a secretary rushed into the meeting shouting, The building is on fire!"
The Methodists immediately gathered in the corner and prayed.
The Baptists cried, "Where is the water?"
The Quakers quietly praised God for the blessings that fire brings.
The Lutherans posted a notice on the door, declaring the fire was evil.
The Roman Catholics passed the plate to cover the damage.
The Jews posted symbols on the doors, hoping the fire would pass.
The Congregationalists shouted, "Every man for himself!"
The Fundamentalists proclaimed, "It's the vengeance of God!"
The Episcopalians formed a procession and marched out.
The Christian Scientists concluded there was no fire.
The Presbyterians appointed a chairperson who was to appoint a committee to look into the matter and submit a written report.
The secretary grabbed the fire extinguisher and put the fire out.
Fully Relying On God for Salvation
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Posted Thursday, May 19, 2005 5:47 AM
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frogs25,
The Presbyterians appointed a chairperson who was to appoint a committee to look into the matter and submit a written report.
You have a problem with that? 
Do Go Be Man
<><
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Posted Thursday, May 19, 2005 6:20 AM
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fH:
It has been my experience since leaving Christian Science that ex-Christian Scientists have fewer questions regarding the medical community than the average bear. It stands to reason since they've gone from one God to another.
That 'joke' (which seems to have pushed your senstive buttons) is running on the Internet by people who have no connection to CS. I just thought it fit....to show how the rest of the world views the subject.
Nyoka
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Posted Thursday, May 19, 2005 6:23 AM
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